Does the liberation of women mean that men are not men anymore? Part Three: the social media industry

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Does the liberation of women mean that men are not men anymore? Part three: the social media industry

‘The social media industry’ is the final part in the blog series ‘Does the liberation of women mean that men are not men anymore? (click these links to read part one, and part two).

The social media industry

Music, TV, movies, and books have been around for a long time, and the growth of the internet has completely changed the way we watch, listen, and read. Depending on your adaptability and willingness to change, this can be either a good thing, or a bad thing. My favourite from those four is books, and personally, I don’t give two hoots what format a good book comes in – the words are more important than how they’re delivered.

Of course, as with all new technologies, there is a dark side, and some uses have been surprising and unexpected. The internet has not been surprising in its use for business – the unexpected side I am talking about is social media sites, and dating.

Gender roles in the 21st century

What happened?

Men used to be men, and since the 1960s, this masculinity has withered away to almost nothing. Now, we have to be sensitive, understanding, and happy to share our feelings. We have to be careful in what we say, what we do, and how we behave. This is so as not to offend anyone, and what a load that is: to be a white man in the modern world means you are not allowed to have an opinion on anything.

Since the turn of the century, the advance of girl power (on top of our already female-dominated society) meant women could do anything a man could do if they so wished. There’s nothing wrong with that, of course, but their argument falls down a bit when it comes to what the public actually likes.

In sports, movies, writing, cooking, and hairdressing (the list goes on), apart from the odd woman, men are at the top of the industry. This is not because of male domination and any kind of suppression of women – it is because the men have more ability and the public want to see them, and the logic stands up the other way round. In music, women dominate. They are the best singers and the best songwriters at present, and this is not because of any kind of female domination and any kind of suppression of men – it is because they have more ability and the public want to see them.

You can have as many tattoos and swear as much as you want, ladies, and you can bleat on about how you are equal to anything a man can do, but sometimes, you just have to raise your game to be seen as on a par with others, and this goes for non-white people too.

The 2000s also saw the rise of the mobile phone industry. Yes, they had been around for a few years, but not on the same level. The phone you have now is so advanced because of what happened in the semiconductor industry at the end of the last century and the start of this one. The technology changed so fast and so much, that now you can’t even live a normal life without a mobile phone, and this tied in so well with the new social media sites that appeared, especially one in particular.

Women and social media means we are living more and more in a female dominated society

Men today

Did you notice when dating sites became such a big part of our lives? Advertising for dates used to be seen as sleazy and stigmatized, but now, they are a perfectly well-accepted way to meet new people, and dare I say it, the most efficient way.

I have been on a dating site. I have looked at women’s profiles. They say things like ‘no one-night stands’, ‘no dirty talk’, and ‘want a nice man’, but when you get into a private conversation with one of them, the gloves are most certainly off, along with limits.

And this is what I am talking about in these blog posts: the public face is a fallacy – in public, be a ‘should be’, and in private, it’s ‘actually be’. What I mean is, though men are not allowed to be men any more in public, everybody wants them to be in private. Everybody wants men to be men, including the women, but political correctness has gone so far now, it’s going to be a tough one to pull back.

We tried it with ‘the beard thing’ over the last couple of years but it doesn’t appear to have worked, so what option is left?

War?

Who is on the internet more, men or women?

Shopping, social media, dating sites: the internet is made for women, and that means the dominant influence they have now is growing. As a man, how many times do you see the online platitudes; the ‘you go girl’ posts that fill your social media feed every day? Men see these and think ‘ffs, what, another one? What’s wrong with these women that they have to bump each other up all the time?’, and then a man posts something they actually think, and he gets slaughtered for it.

The social media industry has grown hugely since the start of the century, and each new addition means we head further towards a female-dominated society.

The future of man

The hot topic in the news recently has been gender-mixing – the lines are becoming increasingly more blurred.

Only women care about making gender-mixing happen.

Women want men to be more feminine, more in touch with their feelings, more willing to share them. Men do not want to do this, but have to feel more accepted in society so have to go along with it.

Society is saying talk about your feelings. Open up. I’m not saying there are no positive things in a female-dominated society – if a man wants to talks about his feelings, he should be allowed to, the same as if a man doesn’t want to. I have done this in the past, in a bad time, and it worked, but now, I don’t need it, and I don’t need to be told to do it. It worked when I needed it to – I don’t need to do it all the time.

Women talk about that stuff all the time, not men.

A session in the gym is enough for me.

Now, women might read this and think ‘we’ve won nothing – men are still the dominant gender’. If that was the case, we would have fewer Health and Safety regulations, no political correctness, no Valentine’s Day, less immigration, no holidays in the sun, no fashion industry, no gender mixing, no ‘soft skills’ in HR, and no humanization of animals (not to mention veganism).

Ladies, when you start a relationship with a man, what’s the first thing you try to do? Change him? Am I right? This is the same in general society terms. All those things I listed just then (a mere snapshot); these have all happened by the softening of men in society, and softening of men comes about by them being changed by women. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – the only relationships that work are the ones where the women are in control. If you’re a proper man and want to do your own thing, any relationship you have with a woman is not going to last very long, and this is why men that want to be men are not allowed to be so.

Does the liberation of women mean men are not men anymore?
Does the liberation of women mean men are not men anymore?

Men and society

Society today is matriarchal.

This is because women are natural carers and men are not. Men protect only those around them, and women want to protect everyone, even lying to people so as not to hurt their feelings.

Women want everyone to be looked after; they want nobody to be offended; they tell people what they want to hear, not what they need to be told. They have softened society so much that you’re not allowed to be a man anymore; not able to say what you actually think in case it offends somebody.

We throw around words like racism and sexism as if they actually are. They are not. An ‘ism’ is a deliberate oppression from one group to another group based on how they look. For example, sexism is not allowing women to vote and making them fight (and die) for that right; racism is taking black people from their homes and making them slaves. Making a joke about somebody which is related to sex or race, or their accent, or the colour of their hair, or their height, is not an ‘ism’ – it is stereotyping, and it is not the same. It depends on how upset the person at the butt of the jokes gets. If you’re mickey-taking, the majority of people laugh it off, but if the mickey-taking becomes so constant that the person starts to feel upset and annoyed, then that is bullying.

It is still not an ‘ism’.

The majority of women don’t tell you what they think – they tell you what you want to hear. Men don’t want to do that. They do it, but they don’t want to. If you tell a woman what you actually think, chances are she will get upset and turn the tables and tell you what’s wrong with YOU. Tell a man what you actually think and he responds with ‘okay, something for me to work on’. He might get upset, or defensive, but he’ll take it on board. Don’t forget, men are inherently selfish – they want to improve themselves because they will gain from it.

Again, that is not to say this is a bad thing. I like the society we live in. What I am saying is this is why we have it. If men were allowed to be men, and to be straight-talking, and say what they wanted, it would bring a whole new set of problems and a period of adjustment.

Be a proper man, society says, and you will be alone (which, no surprise, is what most men enjoy anyway).

Women want to be away from where they are – men want to be away from who they’re with. Why do you think we need a man-shed, a comfort zone where we can be on our own?

It could also be the reason why right wing politics is returning – men are right wing, women are left.

And a resurgent men’s right wing thinking has started to influence the political upheaval across the world. We don’t want the rest of the world invading our comfort zone, so stop it.

And this is where a new set of problems start.

In this country, there has only been a few times when we have genuinely lived in a patriarchal society, and that is when we are in a war. In wartime, men step up: they say ‘enough of that twee claptrap, this is war, this is serious, people are going to die, and we need to stop that.’

They become men again.

Ask the women: they (the ones that are telling the truth) will tell you that they want men to be men too, but every time we are, we get shot down, and every time a woman says that’s what they want a man to be, they get shot down as well.

But, stop.

Is that really what I am saying? That we need a war to get our masculinity back and become men again?

Of course not, but what is it going to take for men to become men again? Growing a beard isn’t enough.

Men are not men anymore

Women are the new empire, and will suppress any insurrection. Men will read this and only in groups of all men, in hushed tones, say ‘hey, that guy’s right’.

This country has been ruled by a queen for over 60 years, and in that time we have had two female prime ministers, both of which did (are doing) a good job, in the face of being called ‘not man enough’ for it – this comes from the idea that men are natural leaders, and therefore, if you want to lead a country, you have to be a man to do it (even if you are a woman).

And I am also affected by this, as I have been all my life. I have been raised in this female dominated society, and if there was a headline for how I think, it would be ‘people are what they are’, but this has to apply to men as well. Though I have said I was raised in a female dominated society, I got that way of thinking from my father, who raised me and my siblings on his own, and he was raised in post-war, when being a man was still allowed.

Yes, let everybody be equal. Yes, let everybody be allowed to be whatever they are, but let men do that as well.

At least it would mean that we are all allowed to be what we are.

Men are violent, aggressive, confrontational. We are mickey-takers. You put a bunch of men who’ve never met into a group, and within a minute, one of them is taking the mickey out of one of the others. That is just the way we are, and we cannot help but be the way we are, same as everybody else.

The way society is now, the natural way of men is being suppressed, and the natural way of women prevails. It is up to you whether you think this is good or bad, but suppressing an aggressive and violent nature normally ends with an unjustified reaction to something, usually something small and innocuous, a final straw that unleashes the beast.

What is that going to be, I wonder?

 

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